Pecs Deflects a Peck of Poisoned Peppers.

click this line if you can't hear the MIDI

Hungarian Produce Potentate Peter Pel pronounced from a podium in Pecs a pyre for poisoned peppers post haste. Plenty of pepper passed through Hungary's ports. Containers of capsicums from Casablanca created this culinary crisis. This only echoed the previous post-summer paprika panic.

Excuse me?

Paranoia permeates the previously peaceful peasantry. Produce protests produce a plethora of police paperwork.

(Looks confused)

Pernicious pesticides!

(wrinkles forehead)

Paraguayan aflatoxin.

That doesn't alliterate Boof.

But it has a nice meter. Paraguayan Aflatoxin. Say it with me, Foof. It dances the light fantastic across my tongue to pronounce it.

Paraguayan Aflatoxin. There, are you satisfied?

Naturally

And your Paraguayan peeve is? Perhaps the paprika was Peruvian.

Perchance. But it doesn't scan as well.

Returning to the recent rejection of Casablancan capsicums that caused a brouhaha in Buda and a pique in Pest. Sounds like a hot time on the old town that night.

Capsicum annum Foof; green peppers caused the current crisis. Carloads contaminated with copious crud came via Cadiz.

Wait! Cadiz? Casablanca? Conflicting countries, comrade.

Iberian intermediaries inflicted the import of containers of contaminated capsicums.

I like stuffed bell peppers, with catsup on top, just like mom used to make. Did you know that peppers and tomatoes are related?

Did you know that you're wasting airtime?

Anyhoo, what next?

Here's our reporter Chocolata Almond Cookie, in person from the PŽcs protests. Over to you, Chocolata.

Thanks Boof. Mad at Morocco? Sore with Spain? I'd say the previously pleasant Pecs peasantry could probably provide a peck of proper peevishness today. Consuming capsicums is a cultural confirmation from here to Csenger. The Grand Gathering of Goulash Gurus in Gyor, otherwise known as the G5, griped that great gastronomic and gustatory grumblings and gnashings would ensue unless this Moroccan matter was mediated. The Magyar masses appear merely marginally mollified by missives from Morocco and Madrid that might mediate this mess. But Magyar missiles are not massing and no-one is mixing Molotov's. Our stringer in Budapest reports, however, that both the Moroccan and Spanish embassies are under siege from grandmothers bearing half-finished goulashes; stalled mid-production for lack of proper peppers.

Some of that doesn't alliterate, Chocolata.

Shut up Foof. And that's all from here. Since there are now proper provisions of paprika at the provisioners I am going to my repast of poultry paprikash.

Thanks, Mr. Know-it-all. You had to pester her over the peppers; now she's taken a powder. I'd rather look at her than you. She doesn't have a five o clock shadow.

She's too sensitive.

You bug her. You know that. Knock it off or she'll take that offer from Fox News.

Fox News can have her. She'd fit right in. Forget her. I'm hungry. You up for chili rellenos?

After a word from our sponsor, and after we finish the news...my mortgage payment is due.

(turns back to camera)

When we return: The Bird Bug is bouncing from Beijing to Boise to Battle Creek to Boston.